Whatsapp Status Update Quotes

Here is a list of Whatsapp Status Update Quotes to Inspire, Impress and Confuse your Friends :)
1. My "last seen at" was just to check your "last seen at".
2. Hey there whatsapp is using me.
3. Typing....
4. You
5. I'm not online, it's just an optical illusion.
6. Not always "Available".. Try your Luck..
7. You don’t have to like me after all, I’m not a Facebook status.
8. Life would be so much easier if everyone had the same cell phone charger.
9. That moment when even Caps Lock can’t express your anger.
10. Phones are better than Girlfriends, At least we can switch off.
11. Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
12. When you drop your phone, your heart hits the ground before your phone does.
13. My girlfriend is like my iPad. I don`t have an iPad.
14. Think twice before you speak, you'd be able to say something more Insulting.
15. I can, therefore I am.
16. I will win, Not immediately But Definitely.
17. You cannot stop the waves but you can learn to surf.
18. War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.
19. Whenever i think of quit smoking, I need a cigarette to think.
20. You have to be ODD, to be number ONE.
21. Live what you love.
22. I stopped fighting with my inner demons. We are on the same side Now.
23. Nothing in the world is more common than unsuccessful people with talent.
24. When everything comes your way.. Then you are on the wrong way.
25. Born to express not to impress.
26. Sometimes it's easier to pretend you don't care, than to admit it's killing you.
27. Some people are alive only, Because it's illegal to kill them.
28. If you like me Then raise your hand, If not then raise your standard.
29. Save water drink beer.
30. I drink to make other people interesting.
31. Not all men are fools, Some stay bachelor.
32. Smile today, tomorrow could be worse.
33. The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
34. Stop worrying about the world ending today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
35. I am only responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.
36. I never make the same mistake twice. Three, four times maybe. But never twice.
37. All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips.
38. They say that alcohol kills slowly. So what? Who’s in a hurry ?
39. Dry fruits are just fruits that have become senior citizens.
40. Having one child makes you a parent, having two makes you a referee.
41. Don’t steal, the government hates competition.
42. I love my six packs so much; I protect it with a layer of fat.
43. The longer the title the less important the job.
44. I Was Born Cool, Global Warming Made Me Hot.
45. When you wait for a waiter in a restaurant, aren’t you a waiter ?
46. Life is not fair; get used to it.
47. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
48. Do it today, It might be illegal tomorrow.
49. I don`t have a bad handwriting, I have my own font.
50. I’m not arguing, I’m simply explaining why I’m right.
51. I don't always have time to study... but when I do, I don't.
52. A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
53. Long time ago I used to have a life, until someone told me to create a Whatsapp account.
54. If my Last seen status doesn't change for two days in a row, call the police, someone must've kidnapped me!
55. There are more important things in life than Whatsapp...like watching TV, and having a beer
56. That awkward moment when you die and life flashes before you and all you see is Whatsapp !
57. Cell phones these days keep getting thinner and smarter... people the opposite.
58. Life is Short, Chat Fast !
59. I'm not lazy, I'm on energy saving mode.
60. Without ME, it's just AWESO.
61. Dear Samsung, please also start selling jeans that can accommodate your smartphones.
62. I'm pretty sure my prayers go directly to God's spam folder.
63. Totally available ! Please disturb me !
64. I Have Over 1000 Channels, And Yet...There's Nothing On TV !
65. If you don't care, stop talking about it
66. Never apologize for being you.
67. Some people just need a High-Five, on the face.
68. Parachute for sale, used once, never opened !
69. I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle ! He's dreaming too.
70. The hardest part of a business, is minding your own.
71. Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens
72. People says impossible is nothing, I do nothing everyday
73. Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.
74. I work for money, For loyalty Hire a Dog.
75. I know i am something, Because god doesn't create garbage.
76. When nothing goes right..!! Go left.
77. I am not lazy, I just rest before I tired.
78. If 'Plan A' didn't work. Don't worry; the alphabet has 25 more letters.
79. Never explain yourself. Your friends dont need it and your enemies won't believe it.
80. If you can't convince them, Confuse them.
81. Oh, So you wanna argue, Bring it. I got my CAPS LOCK ON.
82. I am so poor that i can't pay attention in class.
83. I used to be an atheist, But then I realized I'm God.
84. People say, you can't live without love...I think oxygen is more important.
85. Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
86. 80% of boys have girlfriends.. Rest 20% are having brain
87. If you don't succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried.
88. I love my job only when I'm on vacation
89. The richer you get, the more expensive happiness becomes.
90. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything.
91. Whatever it is, I didn't do it!
92. I am not perfect, I am original.